Irritation Over Small Thing
Today I wake up at 5.05 am, usually, I wake up from 6:15 to 6.30 am. In the recent few months, I have developed the daily rituals of showing gratitude for the beautiful morning, my family, my surroundings, and my wonderful life. It helps me to connect to my inner self. I am knowing myself a little more every day. What is the thought process, what makes me react, how do I behave, etc?
I did not wake up because I wanted but my kid who is just 3 years old, woke up earlier than me and made some noise, my sleep was disturbed, and I wanted to yell, but as I woke up I was calm, show her little beautiful face, innocent eyes all my negative thought washed away.
I sat on the sofa, eyes closed, and followed my daily rituals thanking Super Power for the wonderful day, life, kid, family, weather, friends, and so on. Opened my eyes, entered the kitchen, where my wife was making breakfast and lunch, as she has to rush to her office, poured a glass of hot water, and asked my wife, “What happened to the baby? Why did she wake so early?” My wife was irritated by the noise of my kid. Said to me. “ Ask her, what happened, why did she wake up?” I was a little perplexed by the answer, my mind wanted to react but I controlled, came to my kid held her in my lap, and asked, “Dear, what is the issue, why did you get early? Let us go to sleep.” And the things said to me, I was surprised.
“Mom is about to go to the office, and I want to bid bye to her. So I do not want to miss the opportunity of saying bye and waving my hand.” With a sweet voice, she said.
I realized that my wife is going to her office early in the morning, most of the time my kid and me sleeping, she missed her mom when she got up. And this thing has entered into her subconscious mind that she misses the wavering of hand to say ‘bye-bye, come soon’. I got the answer of my kid waking up early.
Now I started to think over why my wife was irritated, I wanted to ask her straight forward but I wanted her to be cheerful and happy. So without saying a word I just started to connect the dots.
My wife’s timing for her office has changed due to the heatwave. She is not able to complete her sleep, she has to get up early to cook food for us. She is not getting sufficient time for sleep. She has to cook, take bath, get ready, pack her lunch, make tea for me, wash dishes, and a lot more things. When she is alone, she performs her job in the kitchen well but if the kid or I intervene she gets irritation. It is not we, but the timing of her office and sleep is causing her to react to things. I realized, connected the dots, I remained quiet and waited for her to talk. The moment I surrendered, a sweet voice comes, “Dear, I have packed lunch for you, help kid to brush and see that she takes her breakfast” she said with all the sweetness in her voice. My morning is set.
Together with my kid, I went up to the gate to say goodbye, come soon.
Slowly I am learning, to realize irritating things. I am controlling my reaction. I delved into my inner self. To understand anything, we have to see it as a whole not as a part by part. Seeing whole things gives a better understanding and it prevents unnecessary Irritation.
